I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
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