I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
