i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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