Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I wish I could punch you in the face.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize