think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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