Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
