problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
