how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize