Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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