wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
