oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual