forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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