Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize