it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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