You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
