I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Terrible idea I love it
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
