i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
