My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Randomize
