A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
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Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
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I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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