allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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