just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
