My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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