Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
It's blow job season.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
