woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
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