i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
