i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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