nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
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