I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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