I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
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