is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
