why didn't you poke me back
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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