You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
