Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize