break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
a search helicopter?!
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
