I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
