your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
