So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
