so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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