I feel like abortions should bother me more
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
i've created a new STD.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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