We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
