The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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