i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize