This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Randomize
