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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
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