new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
