just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
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She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
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You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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