Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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