Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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