Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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