Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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