I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
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Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize